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An Open Letter to a New York Heart

22 May

You walk around with your hopes and dreams on your shoulders while the subway beats beneath your feet. I wonder what it’s like to hear quick footsteps and the hum of the city. The tall buildings, the views of the sun setting from your rooftops must be incredible. Sometimes I wonder if your lights shine as bright as mine in the night. I’d do anything to feel the energy of your city, to be surrounded by beautiful minds. It’s been so long since I’ve fallen in love, fallen in love with something so much bigger than myself.

They say that New York hearts are as cold as the concrete buildings that fill spaces like the hands of two people in love. I find that hard to believe because even when the hands of  lovers are clenched together, there’s a warmth that fills the soul.

Maybe I’ll meet you soon. Or perhaps you’ll walk past me in the street, headphones on and focused on nothing but getting to where you needed to go. Maybe you’ll be a familiar face or perhaps I’ll be just another face in the crowd.

You’re so lucky to be greeted by such a beautiful place in the morning and to be able to bid it farewell as you lose yourself into the night.

I hope to be able to do the same soon.

 

With all of my love,
A California Soul

P.s. My heart is still there. An incredible man brought it back with him. Should you find it, please hold onto it until I can reclaim it. <3

Stronger Everyday

17 May

These past few days have tested me in ways that I never figured I’d be tested. A lot has happened in such a short amount of time that, often times, I’ve felt overwhelmed and wasn’t too sure that I’d make it through.

Everyday is a reminder of the endless possiblities that life puts before us. We shouldn’t let our fears of failing hold us back from our true potential. I picked up this Audrey Hepburn print on canvas the other day that had one of my favorite quotes on it. I’ve woken up to it every morning for the past few days. It serves as a reminder of what I already know.

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A Rebel Heart

15 May

I may not always do things right, but I always make it a point to express how I feel when it comes to matters of the heart. There wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t tell him how much he meant to me. And although my friends think that I put myself out there too much, I politely disagree. I know what’s in my heart. So when I say it, I mean it with every ounce of me. I refuse to let fear be the one to keep me at bay from my dreams, wishes and hopes.

We’re not here for too long. Don’t wait till it’s too late to express yourself.

 

“IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR WHEN THE WORLD FALLS IN LOVE.”

7 Nov

I absolutely, positively, love this time of the year. I could go for hours talking about my favorite things about the holidays and how much I love them. Haha. I love the little things that make the bigger picture. It’s in the way the green and red lights twinkle, the way people walk past you bundled up in their coats, the way happy couples walk down the street arm in arm and seeking warmth from each other. Haha. It’s the sound of silver bells and holiday music flooding cars, homes, stores and streets. It’s the smell of pine in the cold air and the smell of nutmeg, cinnamon and sweet warm vanilla that flood bakeries. It’s in the way it feels to cozy up with a mug of hot cocoa with extra marshmallows and your favorite movie.

Like I said, I love the holidays. lol.

SUMMER!

16 Aug

Man, it’s been a good summer so far. haha. Despite not going on any trips or too far out of town, I would say that the summer, thus far, has been really good to me. I’ve been taking it easy, enjoying walking around town and just staying local. I’ve been spending a lot of time with my family and getting to see my little cousin who’s finally warmed up to people. She’s hilarious and extremely smart for her age. She’s only a few months shy of two years old, but she’s got quite the personality. haha.

More than anything, my summer has been about San Francisco’s own, GIANTS. It’s all been about day games in the sun and night games under the stars! I’ve also been training for the San Francisco Giants 10k Race, which benefits Project Open Hand. I’m averaging over 5k every single day and recently did my first trial run for the actual race. My 10k time isn’t the best, I’ll admit that. haha. But my goal is to finish the race. Most girls treat themselves to clothes or a new bag for their birthdays, but for me, finishing this race is my gift to myself. It’s the gift of knowing that I can achieve anything if I push myself and if I want it enough. My race is in 11 days. I’m nervous and excited all at the same time, but this is what I’ve prepared myself for. I can do this. I’ve got this!

Anyway, just wanted to check in and let you guys know what I’ve been up to. I appreciate you all for checking back in!

HAPPINESS

2 May

Let me set this up for you…

I’m sitting here on the floor in a simple ass Hanes v-neck & basketball shorts. The curtains are pulled back and the window’s wide open. Outside my window, I can see lights twinkling up on the hills. The moon lights up the sky and the stars stand still as if they were frozen in time. A steady playlist of D’Angelo, Bilal, Maxwell, The Foreign Exchange, Jill Scott, Floetry, Sade, (mellow) Janet & Andy Allo is set. First track plays and the sweet, sweet sound of D’Angelo’s “Heaven Must Be Like This” fills the room. I sit and reflect on the past week and start to organize my thoughts for the coming week.

This is a typical Sunday night. This is all I need. This is what it takes to make me happy. It’s simple, really.

A lot has happened in the past few weeks. I’ve come to the conclusion that happiness isn’t something we need to chase. We know what makes us happy, and it’s as simple as doing these things. Happiness shouldn’t have to rely on something, or someone, for that matter. Before you can attempt to make anyone happy, make sure you’re happy with where you’re at in life. Otherwise, you’ll spend most days trying to please others and you’ll often find yourself in a darker place than you’d imagined you’d be in. That’s one of the worst fronts you can put up.

Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Honey, your happiness matters.

A LOVE STORY…

1 May

It’s safe to say that I’m in love. I know it sounds crazy to just flat out say that, but it’s the truth. And I think it’s something I’ve felt for as far back as I can remember. He’s been there for me since back when I was a kid. We grew up together and we shared some of the same friends. As I got older and things progressed, I remember him being there for me when I was at my best and… my worst. He somehow made me face my emotions, which was necessary for me to grow. And without having realized it at the time, it made our relationship stronger. Middle school was playful banter and it wasn’t until high school and the years following, that things started to get serious. We went everywhere together. I’d go to parties and he’d be the life of it. I used to go to shows just to see him and it hasn’t changed. He taught me to celebrate the joyful moments in life and to learn from the times of pain and trouble. He often put me in tears, but in turn, he gave me the strength and courage to stand before crowds and express what was in my heart. Now that I’ve gotten older, I recognize his significance in my life. He’s there in the morning when I wake up and he puts me to sleep every single night. He somehow knows all the right things to say, even when I didn’t want to hear it. I still cling onto his words. Although we don’t always agree, I try my best to listen. It’s in hopes that I’ll learn something new and appreciate him more. He’s there for me at my loneliest and the only one I want around when I want to get away from the world. And even though I don’t tell him how much I truly love and need him every single day, he’s still there for me regardless with the right words and the right melody.

His name is Music.

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